Sacred Spaces 389 – If the church is not talking about it, then where…
23 July 2013
In our recent winter holidays, I helped on a three day Christian retreat called: Chrysalis. Split into two “flights” (sections); one for guys and the other for girls. So I was helping on the guy’s flight:
I was asked to do a talk on “the single life” which (in fact) really covers more than just a social status and rather is a humble attempt at looking at our sexuality when we grow up: dealing with sex, masturbation and other adolescence issues.
(Even writing that last sentence, feels awkward for me.) Because this topic has become so taboo and awkward in Christian circles and in the church. But why?
After I delivered the talk and answered a few questions at the Q & A session, I carried a mixture of feelings. I did cover good ground in what I said, but there was so much more, I could have said. I felt like I still left some guys with hurdles and unanswered questions in their minds.
But on this retreat thing, time is a constraint and also working with some conservative Christian folk/thought prevents some real stuff going down.
And it got me thinking: Some of this adolescence stuff is not really covered by scripture. Sometimes Christianity is not so “black and white.”
Sometimes there seem to be grey areas. And for some, that scares them. Why though?
(DISCLAIMER – don’t read NEXT paragraph if this stuff makes you feel awkward.)
I don’t really want to go into details. But in a way, I felt I had to declare masturbation as a sin!!! But I was not entirely happy with that. Because biologically is doesn’t match. With a God given sexuality that doesn’t match. I think the answer needed to be expounded upon. We need to tread into grey areas a bit further…
But like I said I won’t go into too much detail.
However my CHALLENGE is this:
Why are we not more OPEN when it comes to this topic and other relationship/adolescent topics?
I remember when I did my ski season in 2009/10 living among non-Christian people, how open and honest these people were.
Yes, sometimes they were crude and disgusting! However they were honest with themselves. And I respected that.
If our young people can’t talk to pastors / their church leaders about sex and other adolescent questions, where would they go?
We live in a real world with real issues. How well are we tackling them?
Sometimes we’re called to bite our tongues
Sometimes we need to speak up
Sometimes we need to step into the grey
Because black, white and grey are all colours from you
Give us bravery